It is always difficult to part with a loved one, even if you understand that the feelings are not the same, and your couple has no future. Even more difficult when you felt the most sincere feelings for a man, and he initiated the break. But in any case, it seems to you that with his departure they take a piece of you. Let's figure out how to start living without thinking about the former and not tormenting your soul with useless experiences.
Do not erase memories of the former
You can find such a recommendation in many magazines and tips of psychologists - throw out all the things that connected you to him, delete the numbers, burn the photos. Why play this tragedy? Yes, he left, but you can’t throw out the past from your life and burn it, it didn’t matter if you were together for a year or ten years, you were good together, you loved each other. And you decided to cross out this segment of life in one fell swoop, simply because your paths diverged.
The separation is not always successful and accumulates a lot of resentment, for which one wants to take revenge. You can always take revenge, but will it only improve your life and help you in the future? Hardly. Your task is to start a new life, and not to spoil the life of your former. Remember all your most pleasant moments - the first meeting, the first kiss, as you sat in the park holding your hand, first declarations of love, smile at what happened, tell your ex thanks for everything ... and let go of your feelings.
Methods of forgiveness of a loved one
For this method, retire in a quiet place for 15-20 minutes. Relax, throw out unnecessary thoughts from your head and control your breathing, make sure that it is slow and deep. Now remember the image of the person you want to forgive and forget. Think about what led to your separation, what his act (or actions) offended you the most, and now try to understand what was the reason for such an act or behavior? Imagine his image not as a specific person, but as a soul. You also have a soul, and your body is just a physical shell. For God, every soul is the same.
Think about the fact that your relationship and parting destiny wanted to convey to you something very important. It was a lesson without passing which you would not understand your mistakes. Each of us in this life is just a disciple who comes into this life with his special purpose, and the help of God indicates your wrong decisions and vices to you, but he never speaks directly about it. The attitude of your partner to you and your finale of relationships is a sign of fate about your negative actions in the past. Mentally thank your partner for this lesson and fate, for the fact that she pointed out your mistakes in time. Henceforth, you will be more attentive to yourself, your life and people close to you. Now mentally speak to your ex and say the following phrase 3 times: "I (your name) sincerely forgive you (partner's name) and ask for forgiveness from you, I release you. I want you to find happiness without me. Now my the heart is open to new love and relationships! "
Revaluation of their feelings to the former
You think that this is love if you are suffering and suffering. But love is a bright feeling that brings positive emotions, and if you suffer, it means that under the mask of love another feeling was disguised, it could be attachment, hurt pride, fear of loneliness. Perhaps you will argue that this is not all about you and that your ex was destroyed, and you still continue to love him. Well, continue to continue to love and suffer, if you like it so much and justify your condition with great love, which in fact has already passed.
After parting with a partner, it is important to suffer and re-cry for a while, and then shake it up and be ready for new relationships. If time does not do this, then you can hang for a long time in past relationships. And no matter if you have found a replacement for old love or not, just think of where you can invest your energy. Imagine that this time is given to you to prepare for a new love - to change the look, read a bunch of smart books, find a hobby or get to work. And, when you will be met by such a smart and beautiful your "prince", of course, you will not be able to resist your merits.
Do not seek to prove something to the former
After parting you can be seized by quiet anger: “How could he so easily let me go? He will definitely regret it, and he will bite his elbows, now I’ll find myself a new suitor, change jobs to a more prestigious one, he will understand who he has lost and then he will come running like a dog. But I’ll certainly think a hundred times whether to start a relationship with him or not. " This way of thinking is fundamentally wrong, so you will think about it even more often and live with an eye to the old relationship.
Do something for yourself, first of all, for yourself and think, even if you become a more successful and attractive woman, and he comes back to you, do you want to renew the relationship with him? He did not appreciate your inner content, and now having bought into the external attributes he considered you a worthy woman. Drive away such gentlemen. They love not for something, and if you have not grown together for the first time, then it is unlikely that it will work in the second. Of course, there are different situations - people converge again and even stronger feelings flare up between them, but this rather confirms that there are exceptions to any rule. Therefore, the advice to you is that you don’t enter the same river twice and it is senseless to live with illusions that a moment will come when a spark will run between you again.
What is there to say - parting thing unpleasant. Only a cracker will probably be able to give up on all this and continue living as before. But, nevertheless, it is not necessary to do parting as the main event in your life. Begin to dream of new bright relationships, and do not represent a specific person, but rather draw an image of a person endowed with important qualities for you. Do not forget that happiness is an amazing thing, it can knock at your door at any moment, and if you mourn the old relationship at that moment, it will unfold and go to another place.
See also: How to make peace with a guy?