In the circle of my friends there are many single women without children. Women are beautiful with higher education, but not married. They agreed to tell me why they didn’t work out with a loved one. After analyzing their stories, I found the main reasons for parting.
Parting is a decision that the further joint life is inexpedient, physical removal (separation, termination of contacts) and termination of relations. It does not always end with the complete cessation of any relationship between people, parting can be a stage to the transition of relations to a new qualitative level. For overly emotional people, parting is a whole story, accompanied by deep experiences of usually negative nature. People usually begin to feel sadness, guilt, gratitude, love and other vivid emotions. Those who leave are beginning to be called rejected, which in the existing cultural tradition is considered to be a big blow to the person’s self-esteem and self-esteem. However, with a positive outlook on life, the termination of some relationships is the opening of opportunities for creating new ones.
It is unpleasant to anyone even when deception happens in insignificant things. So, for example, you reported that you were with a girlfriend in the gym, and you didn’t even appear there, because at that time you were chatting over a cup of coffee in a cafe. And he, in turn, can just “hide behind” the gym, instead of honestly saying how he spent time with friends at the bar. A lie means that tomorrow one of the partners can go on a date with another / other and also, naturally, will hide this fact. But once you have lied, you will always have to lie, and a lie sooner or later comes to the surface. Relationships without trust and based on lies never last long.
This incompatibility occurs when you do not want and can not understand and accept your partner as he is. Love is an amazing feeling. But domestic quarrels can kill him. Therefore, in order to avoid this, it is necessary to learn the "language" of your partner. What he likes in food, movies, books, sports. Ask as many questions as possible: "Why do you like exactly this?" In addition, it is desirable to visit the tolerance training. It is necessary to learn to listen and hear your loved one.
When constant checking calls and sms turn into recklessness, it can certainly lead to separation. Of course, a little jealousy in the relationship does not hurt. But every time to roll up scandals, at least, it is unwise. Most likely, this is because you or he was once betrayed and now everyone is trying to prevent such a situation. The jealousy of another means that you have a very deeply repressed feeling of ownership and have a mass of low self-esteem. If you deal with it in Yourself, then your loved one will be less jealous, verified!
Lack of attention
At first, the guys take care of the girls very nicely. Give flowers smiles small surprises. Topics for conversation come from nowhere. Together, it’s interesting, you don’t want to leave for a minute, and then everything changes: there’s nothing to talk about or you just don’t want, you can only dream of flowers, and he watches TV or sits at a computer, you are in the kitchen every day. It becomes boring, monotonous, sexual attraction disappears. As a result, divorce. Cause of winning once, a person has already come to terms with it, and believes that every day you can not show your love anymore (although she Is!). This is another mistake ...
Lack of cash
Parted when there is not enough money in the family. Unreasonable quarrels, nervousness, reproaches begin .. You spend a lot, you ... In the end, resentment at each other and parting as a result. But if a woman instead of sawing a man - to encourage him and say that she believes in him, to create a good mood for him every day, then believe me, he will be inspired and find a good job!
One of the reasons for parting - cheating expectations. We waited for a miracle, painted a fairy tale in our fantasy - but it turned out ... something completely different. Where does this tale come from? The period of acquaintance is a period of a kind of conquest: everyone tries to show their best sides and hide the worst. And that is true: after all, if you show your laziness now the second half will run away - you get a fairy tale, beautiful and having nothing to do with reality. The tale ends with the beginning of living together: where the “very earthly” questions arise about who will wash the dishes, take out the bucket, walk the dog. You firmly believe that it is his duty, and he is completely yours.
People change at different speeds.
People's views are changing. Each develops in its own way and, after a while, both people become completely different from what they were at the beginning of a relationship. Now, to be together further, this "new" people need to constantly re-learn to understand each other. Usually, before parting, one of the partners changes his views so much that the other is outside his area of interest. So, for example, it happens with some couples in which one of the partners suddenly began to earn much more money, got into a different situation, made new acquaintances and did not want or could not introduce a loved one into this circle of interests. And there are conservative people who are willing to remain with their immutable beliefs, even if they are not true. And if you like everything new, then stability does not look beautiful and reliable, sooner or later it will get tired and the interest will disappear. And the predictable answer and reaction to each question will make you (or him) bored.
Relationships between people can develop in different ways. It so happens that one goes forward without stopping. And it becomes a prerequisite for parting. But there is another option: one goes forward, but takes the other’s hand. In prosperous and stable couples this is exactly what happens. It is important that both always help each other develop. After all, relationships should give both development, inspiration and joy, or accelerate an existing development. And if there is no development, then why are they needed? What is their meaning? Pleasure? On this alone, no one will last long.
Strong and serious relationship to you! :)
Especially for womeninahomeoffice.com - Nastya