Resolving family conflicts


In our personal and professional life, disagreements constantly arise between people who often turn into conflicts. Sometimes the situation is heating up, people are beginning to like each other less and less and may even become enemies. Work, of course, you can change. It is possible and not one. But in family relationships, such a result is clearly unacceptable. And if you want to build harmonious relationships in your family, you should learn how to resolve conflicts. And they, as shown by centuries of experience, even in the happiest families have a place.

Why do conflicts arise?

But all people are different and each has their own opinion and experience. Suffer it for years and sometimes it is hard to part with your own opinion in favor of someone else, perhaps more useful, because it lives with us for so long. Sometimes our actions and thoughts are considered by us as the only correct ones, which means the partner’s actions and thoughts will always be incorrect and it may even appear to us that they have evil intentions when they stumble upon our position.

How to get out of the conflict winner?

The behavior of participants in a conflict situation depends on their conscious or unconscious expectations. Take for example conflict on the basis of personal taste preferences in music. You can try to persuade your soulmate to believe that rock is better than her favorite jazz for a hundred years, but arguing about tastes is a waste of time and energy. It is much easier to agree with any opinion, in order to preserve your mood and opinion, or even to leave, when a conflict seems nonsense to you. Even better, to accept a person with all his taste preferences, no matter how strange they may seem to you. And respect his opinion. Well, or if you are a lover of a fight - you can continue the rivalry. Just remember: this is your relationship and you live in them. Save your nerves and the nerves of your partner.

Much more interesting for the desired solutions looks conflict on the basis of unevenly distributed family responsibilities. If you want to keep friendly family relationships - the examples of behavior described above are not relevant. If you and your spouse (or spouse) want to rest in different places (he is in the Alps, and she is on the Mediterranean Sea), then you can find a compromise solution and rest on the shore of Katori Bay in Montenegro, where there are mountains and the sea. This solution will partially satisfy both parties. But perhaps the most productive option is to cooperate and come to a joint decision to rest in the Alps and the Mediterranean Sea, that is, break the holiday in half. Admit it, it’s not so difficult to solve the question “what can be done so that both are satisfied?”

Often there are conflicts on the basis of unequal distribution of family responsibilities. Who should take out the garbage? And who should eat to cook? Usually a man takes out the trash. Sometimes after a scream to a sweetheart. And women are more likely to cook. But everywhere there are exceptions. Imagine the following picture: your love suffers from a terrible illness and you remain on the farm alone. Will you wait until the person recovers and prepares you to eat? And will you sit starving and watch him starve? Or will you watch the garbage gather around the bucket for another slide? I doubt it. Here cooperation tactics also work. There is nothing wrong with negotiating and sharing responsibilities. But besides this, it is worth helping each other with the fulfillment, because equally you can’t share them anyway.

Remember that one person cannot always make the right decisions. And you can't build a family alone. It is always built by two, and therefore they have joint solutions based on the desire to cooperate, help each other, thus creating a happy family.

The most stupid tactic of behavior in conflict situations - finding the culprit. And the most effective and productive is finding a solution for the benefit of yourself and all participants, if you are not indifferent to those.

So, the main productive tactics of behavior in conflict situations:

· A sound view of the situation in the present tense, and not on the basis of past experience;

· Cooperation and the search for mutually beneficial solutions or, if there are none, the search for alternative ones;

· Respect for the opinion of another person;

· Mutual assistance in any matters.

Let any incidents between you just bring you and your soul mate together!

Especially for - Anton Lazarchenko