You have been thinking about this question for a long time, what is more important in a relationship - to love or allow yourself to love? The traditional female answer and choice is to be loved, but a trite question immediately arises, what about feelings and how to live with an unloved person? Someone may argue that it is not necessary to have a great love for a man, just a little sympathy. But does sympathy make us not sleep at night, think about a man every minute, rush to a meeting like on wings ... Only love makes us commit madness, and maybe it is not necessary for marriage at all. What to choose in a relationship so as not to lose?
Decide what kind of relationship you want and what you expect from them. If you want bright exciting passions, scandals, jealousy, then you need mutual strong feelings. Or you want to give your love to your partner, without demanding anything in return, the main thing for you is to feel the feelings yourself, to see the happy eyes of your partner. And the third option is to give initiative in the feelings of a man, and only accept his love. So decide for yourself what is more important to you in a relationship. As Grandfather Freud said, we first draw a person in the subconscious, and only then he appears in real life. The same with relationships that you imagine them to be, so be it.
When a man loves more
Even if a woman does not love a couple, the fact that she is loved will warm her. If a man loves, then he will give bouquets, drive to the cinema, speak beautiful words, and look with admiration, it would seem that more is needed for happiness. But why then do we remember not those men who did everything for us, but those for whom they themselves had feelings? Because a person is a living being, and his life loses its meaning if he does not feel anything and does not feel emotions. You can build a relationship on one man's love for you, but this is self-deception.
Any person has flaws, but loved ones turn these flaws into cute features, and in an unloved man, flaws will only annoy. So imagine what it is like to live all your life with a man who does not cause any special emotions. And if you touch the intimate side of the relationship, then about any passion and no question. When two people love, they are ready every time to hug each other, kiss or caress. But with an unloved man, none of this would be desirable, which is why a partner will consider his woman too cold, get annoyed and seek solace on the side.
You can argue, saying that it is not necessary to build a relationship with an unloved man, you can feel a little sympathy for him and this will be enough. But I know many examples when a woman, living in such a marriage, suffered from the fact that she lives without feelings and dreamed of meeting true love. In order not to be painfully painful for the past years, it is better to build relationships on mutual love, and even if your paths diverge later, you will know that you lived enjoying every minute with your loved one.
Woman loves more
In this way of developing relations, a woman dooms herself to suffering in advance. You should never justify the devil-may-care attitude of a man. They say that he is with me, which means he loves, nonsense is everything, if a man loves, then it is visible, and if you don’t feel it, then he is with you, because he is comfortable, or for any other reason, but not love Some women choose such a development of novels all their lives - they sacrifice much for the sake of a man, enduring all his antics and demerits, explaining it with great love. A typical example is life with a drunk husband, or a husband who goes left and right. And here the matter is not even in great love, but in low self-esteem, from which we must urgently get rid of, otherwise all such life will come across such partners.
Those women who constantly come across bad men, they themselves attract. A man sees when a woman is in front of him, ready to sacrifice many things for his sake and begins to use it. Self-respecting woman will not hold on to such a one-sided relationship. And even if it happens that a woman falls in love unrequited or hopeless, then she can do everything to quickly forget this man. It is better to be tormented first, than to suffer all your life.
Love balance in relationship
So what's all the same important in relationships - to give love or accept? It is important and that, but without search. Any relationship is a bit of a game, and when a partner gets bored, he cools. Therefore, do not let cool down either to yourself or to your partner. At the beginning of a relationship, it is important that the partners have a strong interest in each other, and then, when you got used a little, start playing.
Do not run on the first call to a meeting, or unexpectedly cancel it altogether, skip one phone call from him, stay out of work, make him doubt your feelings for him a little. But this should be done very carefully, without brute force, using the method of carrots and sticks. Made a small alienation, and then again become white and fluffy, show him how much you love him. And it is very important to catch the moments when it is better to show the gingerbread, and when the whip. Same thing with your partner, choose a man who does not tell you every hour about love, but rarely but accurately. Few people like to be with a man-rag who, as a dog, is ready to fulfill any requests from a woman. It is much more interesting to build relationships with a man who is ready to play a game called love with you.
Remember the phrase: "Love runs from those who chase after it, and those who run away, throws themselves on the neck", so you should not rush to the desperate search for love and grab hold of the first man who came, and then wonder why nothing happened . There is a time for everything, and you will definitely find a person to whom you will gladly give your love and in return receive the same!
Especially for womeninahomeoffice.com.ru- Natella