Undoubtedly, there are also such cases when jealousy is fully justified. But sometimes you begin to realize that there was no reason for jealousy, but a quarrel broke out. how to conquer the unbridled jealousy? How to learn not to be jealous?
Causes of jealousy, or why are we jealous?
- Most often, in most cases, they start to be jealous because they are not confident. A person has low self-esteem, and it seems to him that he is much worse than other people. He does not like his own appearance, it seems to him that the others are more successful, smarter and more interesting. Read more about the causes of low self-esteem of women - in the article Low Self-Esteem of a Woman - heart-to-heart talk
- It also happens that The cause of jealousy can be a past bad experience. And he may even happen not with you, but with your girlfriend, mom, sister or classmate. But you, subconsciously, will believe that this situation can happen again with you.
- Jealousy can arise on the basis of distrust of a loved one and misunderstanding in a relationship.
- Another cause of jealousy is a sense of ownership. You think that the person belongs to you, and only to you. And do not consider such an option that the person - he himself, and he belongs only to himself.
- If you are jealous, it does not mean that you love. First of all it means that you afraid to lose this person.
- And another reason for the emerging jealousy - a great susceptibility to the influence of stereotypes. For example, one of them - all men change. Not all! Much depends on the woman who is nearby.
Learning not to be jealous
- Learn to trust a loved one. Start by letting him go fishing with friends, and give yourself a vow not to call him every half hour, listening attentively, trying to catch female voices (Advice in a relationship can help you to trust a loved one: how to achieve and maintain it).
- Cultivate self-confidence. Arrange self-training on the topic: "I am the smartest, beautiful and unique!" Read the relevant books on the topic of self-confidence education. You will also find a lot of interesting things in the article Love for yourself: how to increase self-esteem.
- Try to just love the person who is next to you. No need to own all his thoughts and feelings. Respect the right of another person to freedom.
- Get rid of the fear that you can lose a loved one. Yes, if this happens, it will be scary and painful. But! The world will not stop there, life will not stop, and you can exist without it. Imagine what you would do if you lost this person? What would you do, how would your day go? When you draw a clear picture in your head, your fear will disappear. And you will simply enjoy love without jealousy.
- Sit by yourself and try understand the reasons for your jealousy. When you are left alone with you, you will not be ashamed to answer any questions. Carefully re-read the beginning of this article, and determine the cause of your jealousy. Having learned the reason, you can make an approximate plan how to continue to deal with jealousy.
- From time to time remind yourself that jealousy is the lot of weak people. But you do not want to be considered a weak person?
- Try to spend more time with your loved one. Set aside for a joint walk, at least a couple of evenings a week. When you will be with your loved one, you will not need to be jealous, because you are near. And then you will feel how beautiful it is when you are not jealous.
- Try to pay more attention to your man. Do you know what his hobby is? Do you know what interests him? Did you try, at least once, to combine your hobbies, or to devote the whole evening to his hobby? Think at your leisure on these issues and read the article How to strengthen the relationship.
- If you are reading this article, most likely, you are already tormented by jealousy not only of your loved one, but also of yourself. Stop being tormented, make scandals, find fault. It is best to talk once with your loved one. Explain the whole situation to him, tell about the causes of your jealousy, explain what you are eating. When you stop attacking a loved one, and present jealousy as your own problem, it is quite possible that together you will quickly come to solving this problem.
- Understand for yourself once and for all that has never happened so that jealousy would strengthen relationships. Unfortunately, the opposite often happens. In most cases jealousy destroys even the strongest relationship. A jealous man after parting does not want to admit that he was the cause of this gap. Now he believes that, being jealous, was right.
- When you limit the freedom of a loved one, it causes nothing but protest. Remember yourself and your friends in childhood. Those children who were not allowed to leave the yard, really wanted to go to another yard, to a distant store and other places. And those children who were allowed to leave the courtyard, most often did not want to go anywhere, because they were far from reluctant. The bottom line is that the more you pinch your loved one in the grip of jealousy, the more zeal and zeal he will seek to get out of there.
- And finally, you did not wonder if this person, as you suspect, is cheating on you, why is he still with you? Why does he tolerate your reproaches and your jealousy? Probably because he sincerely loves you, and hopes that you, in time, come to their senses!
Before jealousy grabs you again in its steel grip, think about what if reason for jealousy no - jealous, at least silly. And if there is a reason, it is already, unfortunately, too late!
Happiness to you and mutual love without jealousy!
Especially for womeninahomeoffice.com.ru - Vitalina