Sometimes the functions of a man in the house are performed by a woman: working for two, feeding the family, taking on the full upbringing of the children. A man at this time just watching TV, and he did not want anything. It's a shame, but the question is why is this happening? Maybe only because they do not see a man in a man, and he feels that nobody needs him?
Is this love?
Put yourself in his place. A woman does everything herself and does not ask for help - it means that she does not need her. And if he suddenly begins to interfere in the process, hears not very inspirational speeches: “Leave, I'll do everything myself, and then spoil something again. I myself go to the store, you do not know how to choose products. I, you all the same you will remember nothing, moreover you will freeze nonsense. " Is this love? Is this a happy family? How can a man in such conditions take the initiative, because he feels his uselessness? And he has nothing left but to sit at the TV and do nothing.
How does a man understand love?
For a man, love is, first of all, CONFIDENCE. When you trust him, you recognize his power.. It’s as if you say: "I rely on you, I believe in you, I give you the right to make decisions and act." Remember that the strength of a woman is in her weakness. A man does not feel loved next to a woman who controls and decides everything for everyone. But he will feel necessary, like air, the one that will tell him: "Protect me, take care of me, take care, for I need it." When we trust men, they begin to transform: from the timid and insecure they become active and agile, they do the impossible, because they are inspired and, above all, loved.
A man can only take on the responsibility that he is given
To give a man responsibility is not very easy, especially when you are used to dispose of everything yourself. But if you do not give him at least a part, he will not be able to take it. It is important to stop controlling. If you are used to choosing products yourself, and you never trust this choice, how can he learn? Only in practice is the result achieved. Do not be picky, do not flaunt what you understand better, but just trust the man to buy products for a month. You yourself will see how he gradually learns through trial and error to buy everything he needs: he will eat yogurt with expired shelf a couple of times and start reading labels. You will also be asked for advice on what to choose. Imagine how much time you have freed for your beloved, and you will not have to carry heavy bags. After all, you are not meant for weights, but for care and affection.
Praise and notice all his achievements!
It is important to show a man that everything he does turns out great for him. After all, you yourself love when you praise. So you praise, do not skimp on good words, support the man and give him fresh strength and energy boost. Male psychology loves specifics, so your man is much more pleasant when he is praised not for abstract things, but for concrete actions. Underline exactly that. Tell him: "How deftly you repaired my hair dryer! What delicious peaches you bought! You organized the celebration so well for our children!" These words are much more important for him than: "You are so gentle! You are caring! You are good!". This is the nature of male nature.
It turns out that we are all drawing on our fragile female shoulders is often our own mistake. We have been taught since childhood: trust only for yourself, do not trust anyone, no one will do better. And now our men can not feel strong and loved, because we do not trust them to care about themselves. Think about how you are raising your child (or how you will raise him when he appears): will you tie his shoelaces up to the tenth grade and do his homework for him or will you teach yourself independence and responsibility?
By doing all the work alone, you deprive your man of vital energy, initiative and the possibility of self-realization. Such a man will eventually forget how to turn on a washing machine and where is the school of your children. And just find someone on the side, because I want to be loved. Do not deprive him of love, give him the opportunity to feel necessary, trust his reliable and strong arms, then his wings will grow. Because now there is someone to live and do great things! And you will feel like a woman, desired, loved and protected.