The blessing of young people at a wedding is the consent of the parents to their marriage, expressed solemnly, in the presence of guests. This is a wish for them a happy life. For many mothers and fathers, this moment raises many questions: how to bless the newlyweds, who should do it, when and in what form, what to say? Consider the answers to these and other questions from the point of view of secular society and Orthodoxy.
The tradition of blessing at the wedding
The blessing is, by its definition, permission to commit an action. Any important business in Russia was decided to begin with a petition for blessing. The meaning of this act is laid in the very word: "good" + "word". This is a kind, good parting word, endorsement of the decision to leave the parental home and enter a new - family life.
The tradition of parental blessing was laid in the Orthodox faith. But in different forms, it is present in other religions. This, in fact, was nothing more than the consent of the parents to the marriage. If children decided to join it without the blessing of their parents, it was considered a grave sin and condemned in society. Family life of such a couple from the very beginning was considered unfavorable. The priest could refuse to marry a couple who did not receive the blessing of the older generation.
Now the blessing of parents at the wedding has become a ritual tradition. But its meaning remains the same. This is parental consent for marriage, support and approval. And from the side of young people it is a tribute to the wisdom of the older generation and respect for its opinion.
When does a blessing occur and what are its required conditions?
Young people usually receive the first blessing at the moment when parents gather to discuss wedding details. This usually happens in the bride's house.
For the second time, parents bless their child at home, before going to the registry office or to church. But the most solemn moment of blessing usually comes at the very celebration. Sometimes it happens before the marriage ceremony. But in practice, most often the parents of the bride and groom wait with the icons for the newly registered newlyweds on the threshold of a festive establishment, in which this important event will be celebrated.
First of all, it is worth saying that there is no single binding script of this rite. But there is one indispensable condition. If parents bless young Orthodox icons, then the bridegroom, the bride, and the one who holds the icons must be baptized. Both parents and godparents can bless.
However, there is another important point that must be respected. This is the consent and moral readiness of all participants to conduct such a ceremony.
How to bless the young?
For the blessing of parents at the wedding of their son (the groom), an icon of the Savior is usually bought. For the bride purchased the icon of the Kazan Mother of God. If the family has a family image, it can be taken for the ceremony. However, you need to know that after this icon remains in the house of the young. They must keep them as relics.
Before marriage, parents (usually mother) wrap the icon with a new beautiful towel. You can simply take the image on the towel.
Then, turning his face to his son or daughter, three times overshadow his child with an icon from top to bottom and left to right. Those. first to his right shoulder, and then to his left. They say a parting word, usually without prying eyes. This is the moment when a son or daughter should hear the most intimate, the most important parting.
The most solemn moment of blessing comes when the newly-made husband and wife approach the porch of a house or a banquet hall.
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Who holds what icons during blessing?
Immediately make a reservation that the rules on this score does not exist. There are only traditions. In different localities and among different peoples of our country, they may differ. In addition, not always at the wedding, parents are present in full membership - this also makes its own adjustments.
We give the most common options:
- If the icon is one (skladlen), then it is kept by the groom's father. In the hands of the bride's mother - a loaf with salt on the towel. The groom's mom and dad brides just stand there.
- If there are two icons, they are kept by mothers. Then the groom's father holds a loaf, and the bride's father - champagne and glasses.
- Moms hold a loaf and folding, in the hands of the fathers - glasses of champagne. Or they just stand nearby.
We say parting words
The first, according to tradition, with a parting word refers to the young mother of the groom. In her words, the approval of this marriage, the willingness to accept a young wife into her home should be visible. She promises to give her help and support, and she is asked to adequately keep the family home. Turning to her son, she asks him to love and respect his wife.
If the groom's father joins her with his word, he should address the son more. He wants him to be a real husband, a man, a breadwinner and a father.
What should be the blessing on the wedding of the parents of the bride? The first is usually the father. Turning to his son-in-law, he says that he gives him his precious treasure - his beloved daughter. Asks to always take care of her, respect and love. And the latest blessing of parents at the wedding, the newlyweds hear from the lips of the mother of the bride. These are the most heartfelt, most touching words addressed to the daughter and her husband. She wants them to overcome adversity together, appreciate the moments of joy, always be together and raise happy children.
Of course, the words of the blessings of parents at a wedding can be anything, this is just an example. But they must bear love, a call for understanding and for independence. No need to hope that you will say your parting word impromptu. In a moment of excitement, all the right words can be confused in your head. But you should not learn it by heart. Forgetting one word, you cannot continue. And besides, your words will lose their charm and sincerity. Better to just mark the points, plan.
Icons and rushny - heirloom
After the wishes are said, the parents overshadow the children with icons and let them kiss them. Then the icons are wrapped in the towel and given to the bride. Now it is their family value. In her future home she should put them in a visible place, never perevarivat anyone and take care. If a young couple is not a believer and does not want to put icons in their home for everyone to see, they should be carefully kept in a special place wrapped in a towel.
Of course, not all families are Orthodox. Now young people have a choice - to perform a ceremony according to religious rules and traditions, or to receive the blessing of parents at a wedding in a simpler, secular way. Remember that the main thing is not the rite itself, a certain order of actions or the order of parting words. The main thing is sincere wishes of love and prosperity, peace and happiness in family life for their children. This is the approval of their choice, not in words, but from the bottom of their hearts!