What to do if it is hard, anxious and difficult to make a decision and understand what to do next? In this case, we usually consult with someone. It is a big and important work to even talk about what is worrying, to get rid of the oppression of problems and let them out. But with whom to share? Who is best to entrust your experiences?
What to talk with friends?
With friends you need to communicate necessarily. This increases our female energy. Such conversations enrich our lives, because this is an equal conversation. On the one hand, there are things that are very difficult for a man to understand, but a woman will understand at a glance. On the other hand, having spoken with friends, sharing experiences with them, we will not bring negative emotions to the family and will not “load” the husband with our problems.
Especially valuable is communication with women who are happy in their work and family life. Such friends can recommend a lot, based on their experience and female wisdom. There is only one rule - you can talk about everything except your man! It can not be discussed with friends in any case.
What can you tell your parents?
With parents, you can and should talk about your problems, because then they are parents, to support in difficult times, to help and advise. But, in truth, each family has its own peculiarities. And there are such parents with whom it is better not to share the problems - they will blame you for everything and, instead of helping, only add more negative emotions. Although when it comes to very important and personal problems, it is better to discuss them with parents, whatever they were, than with friends. If you have your own family, and there are some difficulties in it, then we advise you not to wash dirty linen in public and not to devote your parents. The exceptions are situations when the family is already called the family only formally, and the woman really needs help from the side (the husband gives up, takes away the children, etc.).
What to discuss with my husband?
You can talk about a lot with your husband, but metered. You don’t need to tell him about any "purely female" problems that you can discuss with your friends: you don’t know why you can’t cook pasta or rice for dinner today did not compliment any colleague. It is highly undesirable to discuss with your husband past relationships, compare him with one of the men and talk about how the boss flirts with you. But with him it is possible and necessary to talk about monetary matters, economic problems, raising children. It is also important to share with your husband health problems, if any. It is advisable to tell him everything in essence, without unnecessary emotions and sighs.
Why do we need psychologists, mentors, spiritual teachers and personal diaries?
If you do not consult anyone, you can contact a psychologist or your mentor. For example, you have a problem with your husband: you suspect him of treason and suffer greatly. I don’t want to talk to my friends about this with my friends, my husband laughs off, he remains, who can tell something objectively and uninterestedly, even from the standpoint of experience and wisdom. Well, if your psychologist is a married woman, because she really understands you, she knows the situation from the inside, not by hearsay. When talking with a woman who herself is happily married, we see a real example of how to live in harmony and keep love in a relationship.
If there is no such person in your environment, entrust your thoughts to the pages of your personal diary. By transmitting thoughts to paper, we give her our negative emotions and free ourselves from what prevents us from thinking calmly. By keeping a diary, we can look at the situation not only from the inside, but also from the outside, which can be very useful.
If you are afraid that someone will read the written, do not store the sheets, but destroy them immediately after writing. You can read about the benefits of written pages in the article How to put your thoughts in order and find your creative way: the morning pages.
Do I need to talk about problems?
Of course, it’s better to discuss something good, bright and kind with everyone. Infinitely complain, criticize and blame the world for its injustice is not worth it. But if something important has appeared in your life that is disturbing, do not carry it in yourself. So you can start the mechanism of the disease and harm itself. therefore share your feelings, but do it correctly, in accordance with the recommendations received.