My wife comes home from work, stands at the stove and starts cooking dinner. The child is underfoot underfoot, and the husband plays at the computer at this moment in the room. Common situation? Want to fix it? Try some of the following tips.
To establish new orders may take from a month to a year. It all depends on your willingness to change itself, on the nature of your man.
Enter new rules
It must be something simple and unconditional at the same time. For example: "A man cuts bread in our house!" And further recall this repeatedly. Inviting to the table, show on bread, recalling the task of her husband. With guests, you can clarify that this rule is due to the fact that the man - the breadwinner in the family. And he should share who deserves food. It seems to be a small assignment, but at the same time, the man’s self-esteem rises (he was called his earner, he also stressed it for all). After a while, the husband himself will gladly not only cut the bread, but also pour the food.
Appreciate what the husband does
No matter how we are assured that we are all adults, in the soul each of us remains a child. It's nice when they notice your small achievements, even if just a pleasant word. No need to sweeten too much: "Wow, what a fine fellow you are! I could do it straight and carried out a whole bucket of garbage!" Suffice it to say that you are happy to help: "I am very pleased that you took a bucket of garbage with you. It is inconvenient for me and the child to make a hook to the garbage can."
Find his advantage
Of course, there are men who have never approached the stove. But there are very few of them, so they can be classified as rare representatives. If a husband at least once in his life prepared something for you (even if during the period of long stormy courtship) and this “something” turned out to be edible, remember his culinary feats more than once. There is a little trick: by the weekend, buy products for that dish and say: “Eh, I missed your pilaf so much! (Chicken, salad, pasta in a naval style) to choose. This will allow a man to feel its importance, even when doing homework.-
This advice may apply not only to the kitchen. If the husband vacuums in every nook and cranny, unlike you, ask him to pick at the moment when you cook his favorite dish. Then the execution of your order will be associated with reward and pleasure at the end of the work.
Learn to negotiate
If you work together, then the idea should be equally tired. Therefore, you can offer a mutually beneficial option: "I cook there, you wash the dishes." Or "While I cook there, you have an hour to play at the computer. But after dinner, I sit at the computer for an hour, and you clean the kitchen (in the room, take off the dried laundry from the balcony, play with the children)." Partnerships do not begin with a common bed, but with the ability to solve emerging problems.
Prepare a reward system
It can be anything: erotic massage before bedtime, favorite dishes on the table, a bottle of beer in the fridge. But the reward should be given only after the execution of your order. In principle, the "carrot and stick" should be more "carrot" than the "carrot". As a punishment, you can say that you are tired after work, and since nobody helps you, everyone will live on semi-finished products. And if the originally cooked dumplings seem tasty, then after the 5th time the family will want to return the old delicious dishes.
Drop the idea to manipulate love
This is one of the most common mistakes of women. If he does not have love for you, then you will not have him. This can cause irritability due to dissatisfaction. And he - the idea to have a mistress. Is this really what you wanted to achieve?
And finally, remember: we are all living people. We differ from animals in that we can talk, think and analyze what is happening around. For your man there will definitely be a special approach that will make it possible to turn him not only into a faithful companion of life, but also into a reliable helper in household affairs.